Random Thoughts............................

I'm at work listening to my mp3 player and these are the thoughts that I jotted down on a paper towel

-Well I did pick these songs ( Must have been answering myself in my head, lol)

-Would I risk hell to be with you again?

Bored

-C my days are cold without u, but I'm hurting while I'm with you.

Bored

Your love was my drug, I was and still am addicted 2 you. There are times I get the will power not 2 think about u, but the thoughts always come back..................

-Baby why you hurt me, leave me and desert me.

I need love..............

Have I ever loved anyone besides u 2? Yes I almost forgot about him. lol

Romeo and Juliet
Hot s.e.x. on the platter just to get you w.e.t.t.

Juicy fruit

Juicy is a cutie.
She's a treat.

You can l...ick me everywhere............

1 more child and husband/daddy 4 completion

Congratulations.........................

Saw an old friend on the street

She said today's your wedding

My heart stopped

The tears dropped

Saw my whole life pass me by....................

Well thats the song that I'm listening to now.
Thanx Vesta for putting my pain to music.
Every time I hear this song I think of you.
I wonder what could have been............

Would at least one of my children have your "mood" eyes...
Would another have your "roman" nose......
Which one would have gotten your temper......
And all that excess energy.

You still look good.
Lord why was I hoping that you'd gotten all fat and out of shape.
Maybe even bald.
But you're still the sexiest man alive to me..........
And you still have the ability to take my breath away......
Standing there with your wife and new baby.....
For just a second you gave me that old familiar smile and the whole world melted away........
I'm surprised I didn't pass out...
My breath got caught in my chest and just seemed to stay there...
I tried my best to play it off.
And act like I didn't recognize you.
But I know you knew better.

Why is it that when I think about you I can only recall the good times.......
I know we had plenty of bad,
but for the life of me I just can't remember them.
Well... Let me take that back I remember how you broke my heart.
And used my love for your own selfish reasons.........
And after all these years I still love you.
After everything thats happened........
You are still my first love..............
And you might possibly always be my greatest love.........
I hope not......................................................................

Ye Yo..........................

lyrics by : http://www.sweetslyrics.com


Ye yo, ye yo, ye yo, ye yo

(Help me)

Ye yo, ye yo, ye yo, ye yo...

Sometimes,Sometimes I get so lonely, lonely, lonely

I feel all by myself up here

That's when, I take a minute

To re-evaluate

All of the things I think are special

Oooh like....................

When you wake up in the morning

And you see the morning sun

And you need to know the world is on your side

Who do you run to.....................

Who can you turn to..................

And then the evening comes to greet

And you need someone to hold you close

And you feel you need to rest your aching mind

Who can you run to

Who can you turn to

Well see the sun's in the east and the moon reflects

Like the knowledge and wisdom, I manifest

If you wanna go to heaven lay up on my breast

I'm ye yo, you're ye yo

I say the sun's in the east and the moon reflects

Like the knowledge and wisdom, I manifest

If you wanna go to heaven lay up on my breast

I'm ye yo, you're ye yo

Ye yo, ye yo, ye yo.....



I just can't get this song out of my head.

I'd been listening to it earlier in the day, but when I was on my way home for the evening the words just hit me so hard................

I realized that I was driving and singing with tears streaming down my face.

I think that I'm trying to be grateful for all of the many, many blessing that God has granted me,
but I fall short sometimes harping on the one thing that I really feel is missing in my life.

Sometimes I get so lonely, lonely, lonely

I feel all by myself up here

That's when I take a minute

To re-evaluate

All of the things I think are special

Oooh like....................

At the place that I'm at in my life right now. I don't think that there are any truer words to describe my thoughts.

Things that I think are special........................

My kids.

Sunsets.

Playing in the rain with someone I love.

Curling up on the couch with someone special.

Long, hot showers with no interruptions.

Weekend nights, when the kids are asleep and I have the energy to stay awake and just watch tv or read a book in total peace and quiet..................

Me, Myself, and I

I was just realizing that I am my own best friend.



I realized this because I have full conversations with myself in my head.



I'm not sure if that is a good or bad thing, but I really don't trust anyone enough to totally unload whats on my mind.



Actually maybe the people that I'm around now are the ones I don't trust because I'm so different from all of them.



Truth be told I really don't have anything in common with any of them, so it would be stupid of me to ask for any of their opinions.



The people that I actually have something in common with are the ones I grew up with and I have driven all of them away with of my inability to forgive.



"To err is human, but to forgive is divine." I think thats how that goes.



I really do need to find a way to find people that I can actually relate to, but at the moment it looks like thats not going to be happening anytime soon.



There is one person from my past that I want to reconnect with, but I'm just not sure how I would even go about that.



I really didn't give him the chance that he deserved, but if I had my life would probably be totally different. But then again that might not be a bad thing...............................



I can only hope that the most high, hears my prayers, sees my unshed tears, and will allow me to make amends with this man.



I guess its true that you never know how much someone adds to your life until they are gone from it..........................................................



He truely was a beautiful person inside and out, and he brought alot of joy to my life, but I was just to damned immature to realize it then.



I can only hope that life hasn't beaten him down and changed his optimistic point of view.

I got this from http://hopelesspoet.blogspot.com





So now to bold if its true :O





I am a cuddler.
I am a morning person.
I am an only child.
I am currently in my pajamas.
I am currently pregnant.
I am currently single.
I am currently suffering from a broken heart.
I am left handed.
I am married.
I am addicted to my myspace.
I am online 24/7, even as an away message.
I am a little shy around the opposite gender at first.
I bite my nails.
I can be paranoid at times.
I don’t like anyone.
I enjoy country music.
I enjoy jazz music.
I enjoy smoothies.
I enjoy talking on the phone.
I have a car.
I have a cell phone.
I have/had a hard time paying attention at school.
I have a hidden talent
I have a lot to learn
I have a pet.
I have a tendency to fall for the “wrong” guy/girl
I have all my grandparents
I have at least one brother
I have been to another country
I have been told that I am smart
I have been told that I have an unusual sense of humor
I have OR HAD broken a bone
I have Caller I.D. on my phone.
I have changed a diaper
I have changed a lot over the past year.
I have done something illegal.
I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color
I have had major/minor surgery.
I have killed another person
I have had my hair cut within the last week.
I have mood swings
I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life
I have rejected someone before.
I have seen The Lord of the Rings trilogy.
I have seen the television show The O.C.
I like Shakespeare.
I like the taste of blood.
I love to cook.
I like to sing.
I love Michael Jackson
I love sleeping.
I love to play computer games.
I love to shop.
I miss someone right now.
I own 100 CDs or more
I own and use a library card
I read books for pleasure in my spare time.
I sleep a lot during the day.
I strongly dislike math
I watch soap operas on a regular basis.
I will try almost anything once.
I work at a job that I enjoy.
I would classify myself as ghetto.
I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
I am currently wearing socks.
I am tired.
I love to paint/draw/sketch/sculpt.
I have had/have a broken heart
Graduated High School.
Smoked cigarettes.
Rode every ride at an amusement park.
Collected something really stupid.
Gone to a rock concert.
Helped someone.
Gone fishing.
Watched four movies in one night.
Gone long periods of time without sleep.
Lied to someone.
Been dumped.
Failed a class.
Taken a college level course.
Been in a car accident.
Been in a tornado.
Watched someone die.
Been to a funeral.
Burned yourself. (accidentally)
Ran a marathon.
Your parents got divorced.
Cried yourself to sleep.
Spent over $200 in one day.
Flown on a plane.
Cheated on someone.
Been cheated on.
Written a 10 page letter.
Gone skiing.
Been sailing.
Cut yourself.
Had a best friend.
Lost someone you loved.
Shoplifted something.
Been to jail.
Had detention.
Skipped school.
Got in trouble for something you didn’t do.
Stolen books from the library.
Gone to a different country.
Dropped out of school.
Been in a mental hospital.
Watched the “Harry Potter” movies.
Had an online diary. (this blog is my diary)
Fired a gun.
Gambled in a casino.
Had a yard sale.
Been in a school play.
Been fired from a job.
Taken a lie detector test.
Swam with dolphins.
Gone to sea world.
Attempted suicide.
Voted for Pop Idol.(Arabic Super Star or Star Academy)
Written poetry.
Read more than 20 books a year.
Gone to Europe.
Loved someone you couldn’t have. (Lord yes!!!!!)
Had surgery.
Had stitches.
Taken a taxi.
Seen the Washington Monument.
Had more than 5 IM’s/online conversations going at once.
Had a drug or alcohol problem.
Been in a fist fight.
Suffered any form of abuse.
Had a hamster.
Petted a wild animal.
Used a credit card.
Gone surfing in California.
Dyed your hair.
Got a tattoo.
Had something pierced. ( Only my ears)
Got straight A’s.
Your parents sent you to a shrink.
Been handcuffed.
Known someone with HIV or AIDS.
Taken pictures with a web cam.
Started a fire.
Had a party while your parents weren’t home.
Gotten caught having a party while they were gone